A compliment for yourself

I think we all like it, when we get a compliment. 

And, guess what, now and then I become one as well  :-)  

Sometimes they are expected, others come right out of the blue.  

I not wait for it, I am not fishing for it. There was a time, that I desperately wanted that others liked me, or should admire me, for things. The more I tried, the less it worked.  I was expecting so much from others, that I forgot thatt I have to do something, before I can get a reaction back.

A longer time I was afraid for doing something.  I was sure that, when I did do something, help, or whatever, that the other should be disappointed.  And it often went that way.  More in my head, then that the other really was disappointed. I was often most disappointed about myself, and thherfore not able to see, that others value me.

It changed.
It was a road I went (not really to be written here, a few of you know), before I could accept myself the way I am.  There were some huge stones on  my path, that I could not move, and they blocked me from getting to love myself (again)

Until the moment, that I realized, that I was fed up, in trying to move those rocks. I all the sudden accepted, that they should not move, no matter how I try. 
At that moment, I started to search for other ways.  Climbing at the rocks, what was NOT a good plan, so, back then, and walking aruound them.  The  stones remained at their place, but I discovered another world. A world where I could accept compliments, a world, where I could geve compliments, a world in what I accepted myself, the way I am.
Just like mit true friends already did, I all the sudden found the inner peace in me, that I not needed to fight any longer, to be appreciated.

I valued myself. I found my inner peace, and I found that I am happy, with who I  am. I am not perfect, not at all, but I am me, and I have to live with myself for thee rest of the life. All others come (and go), but I am with me, for my lifetime.

With   my inner peace growing,  with liking myself more, I got less urge for  searching for compliments.  And then it happened.  I noticed that I had my peace (again) to listen to people, and to do what I am good in.  My wall became windows, and a door. I could let people in, and those  people were, just like me, searching.  Struggling with problems.  That I can not solve.

I realize that I not need to sollve them.  I see, that a listening ear, a shoulder, is more important.
When I try to understand others, when I cry with them, laugh with them, I give them, what I should like to get from others as well. 
And I always get back, what I give.

So, no longer I want to give insecurity, or hide behind the stones.

Now it is time to say, I cant do miracles, but I can listen, and I do care.
And all the sudden, the miracles start to happen.