You have no idea
Montag, 30. November 2020
As you might know I am a photographer. For fun, I should do other things next to it, so far the theory (yes I am guilty!)
Next to sharing my photos, it is also nice (and, to me, essential) to be challenged in it. I do the challenges alone (like the 52 Trees), or I let myself be inspired in groups, and Facebook is the perfect place for gaining that inspiration.
There is a group, I am member in, who has very few rules, and a nice challenge. One of the rules is, that you should use your own photo, according to the given word. The word is chosen in random, every week someone in the group chooses the words.
Now, as in every group, there are always people who 'forget' the rules, and then luckily a few others are telling and correcting this to the one who posted. So far, so good.
Unless there are people, who disagree with the rules. Strange, when you join a group and disagree with the daily rules, why are you in the group then, anyway.
The alternative is, building your own group, with your own rules. Sad, however, when you then try to steal the members out of the old group, appearantly why you not have an idea how to find people (no friends, maybe?).
The more sad it becomes, if you continue to break the rules. Putting things at the border (as in stealing a photo from internet and publish it as your own, eventually edited).
The more strange it is, when such person is awarded with the week award. By a person that jut has broke the rules as well (another rule,but still).
A new bomb is placed under the group. And I look forward to see how the bad boys and girls are going to leave.
As in chess, it is good to think forward, to what next step could be, and anticipate on that on forward.
And who knows me, knows how difficult it is, for me, to wait and not wildly kick around . But, I can, I am improving!
I keep looking from aside, today. And here as well I believe in Karma, just like by Trump, I can not wait to see the evil leaving! :)
Sonntag, 30. August 2020
No, this time it is not a story about 'the masks', but about a mask. A mask people can pu tup, to give others an inaccurate impression of themselfves.
Let name the man Arnie.
I know Arnie for a longer time. We went together in a very intesnive training, what lasted 9 months.
At our introduction to the training, Arnie was noticed by my colleagues. Someone asked him, if he could take off his hat, so that we could see how he looked without it.
That was a legal request, we were all there supposed to be ourselves, and a hat, or so, could lead away from finding out who the real person is.
From that day on, I had a feeling in my stomach, that Arnie is not genuine. Arnie seemed to hide things. All the others in the group were honest, showed their feelings, and were as in a team. Arnie was an otusider. He was always too late at our training, could not find a parking lot, forgot the date, or had planned double, he was doing some other projects similar to our schooling.
In the months that followed, we became a very close group, knowing so much of ourselves, and of the others, as that we probably ontly talked about to our partners, and I am not even sure about that. :)
Arnie remained a closed book. He was always leading away from the subject, with his 'adventures', a cold a this, a that. But what was really the thing with Arnie, I could not find out.
At the end of our education, Arnie failed. He withdraw from the duties and 'should concentrate on his other projects' Of course Arnie did not fail, and I was strongly confirmed that there was something what we not knew of Arnie.
Time went by, and Arnie found me on Facebook. Now Facebook is an open book, you can find so much about people there, even without searching.
So, it appeared that Arnie had done a few more projects, that are all failed and ended. I was not searchinf for it, just reading messages that passed by.
Now I was searching for another friend, finding out about the upcoming local elections here in Germany. One of the parties, that I am intrested in, I watched closer.
And guess who is on the list of proposed candidates for a position in the city council?
Exactly, our Arnie.
I still have sympathy for the party, will not vote for Arnie, he is at a safe low place.
But, it all proved that my 'feelings from the belly' are right.
Arnie can impress people easily with his charmes, and it is no wonder that that happened again.
As a topping on the cake, I noticed that Arnie wrote as his profession 'Actor'.
I think that that is one of the few tings of Arnie, that is true.
No, I will not tell anyone who Arnie is. None of you can know it.
The lessson learned, and the lesson I have for us all, is, look further then the masquerade. Trust your belly, trust your feelings. If you doubt, you have reasons for it.
I loved his meatballs, by the way!
Donnerstag, 13. August 2020
Some people think that they can continue, as if nothing has changed.
Other people may forgive, but not forget
I belong to those 'other people'.
Who hurts me once, I forgive. Who hurts me twice, I will remember. Who hurts me more, I will forget.
It is fully unfair, when you accuse me, and then, after the storm is over, just pretend that everything is like before.
Maybe I treated you wrong, or acted not as you expected. But the least you can do, is say I am sorry.
If you can not do that, I consider that you are not sorry at all, and you do not know what you did. To me or to who else. It might be part of the roblem, that keeps you wondering, why you are, every time again, disappointed in people, in friendship or in relations.
If you think, that you not hurt me, then you know me not as well, as that you think.
if you can look behind my masquerade... then you are in my rings. You not need to fight your way out anymore, you are in. One closer, one further away.
If you, however, do not try to heal the damage, you will orbit out of the rings, in the dark space. And the chance that we meet (and possibly greet), are close to zero.
Fill in the puzzle, with names. Maybe I mean you. Maybe not. :) You know it, and so do I
Samstag, 8. August 2020
It's been a while, and I urgently need to update ny blog again!
It is so cool, that I always can return here, to my private on line diary, available at all devices. 😊
It was a hot night, barely slept, and it is going to be a hot day.
It is Sunday, also guess who is lazy today?
A tea (lol) and time for a longer email to my brother. He is a bit too quiet, imho, so let me take the tiny step. Sozializing in the corona era!
Samstag, 6. Juni 2020
I reacted at something someone copied (a speech) at his time line. My reaction was a bit emotional and just sideways to the topic.
The reaction, that came back promptly was, if you have an opinion, put it at your own 'timeline'. and that made me thinking, because a lot of people have this kind of attitude.
The question that bubbled up in me is this.
We 'all' have our own area at facebook, where we can post and do what we want (within the rules, of course). Why should I not react, when someone, who is in my friends list (also who matters, for one or another reason), posts something? I can add a thumb or a silly smiley, but I can also discuss the subject.
What is the use of posting things, when you then seem to say, hey, guys, I posted this, take it or leave it. It is MY property.
Maybe I should accept, that not everyone is like me. When I post something (it can be provoking), then I like to see reactions. It happens that I change my mind, during the discussion, or (most likely) not. It helps to give me insight, in why another is acting or telling things his/her way.
I do like it so much, to get smarter, to understand others.
Why are people blocking me, for when they post something (about the bill gates conspiracy, for example), and I ask, what the sources for their post are?
Why is it better for them to ignore my question, rather then trying to convince me for why they stand for an opinion?
I am not sure if I want to know the answer. Because I think I know the answer already.
I better let go. If I can :)
Sonntag, 3. Mai 2020
The idea is seasy.
Search a stone, paint the stone, lay it out, to be found, somewhere, and, when you fond it, tell it at Facebook, and then put the stone anew somewhere, so that someone else can find it.
Now, in the time of Corona, many people have much more (free) time then before, and especially families with kids are painting and putting the stones everywhere.
Of course Facebook remains the place of the adults, they make groups, they make ruels.
As you know I do not like rules (shove it!) and, I do just what I want. I can not paint, but I can find, I make a photo, post it, and then (eventually) put the stone somewhere to be found again.
Everytime I find one, I feel happy and good.
A few days ago, my wonderful and dear friend Margaret passed away, and, of course, that was a pretty sad day. Two days later, I felt like going on my way again, and I took my bicycle, with high expectations. Not sure about what... but that there should be something on my way.
When I biked along the small Chapel (guided by a police patroulle, how weird those times are!), I saw something glittering. I looked better, it was green, and I though, wow, a stone! And indeed, it was a stone. Not a stone that follews the (adult) rules, also with the group name written behind. Just a stone. Sparkles on it, at the kneeling bank before the chapel (it is all open air there).
The child in me cheered up, and I felt very lucky, to have found that one. I looked at it, made a photo, and then a little robin was whistling, so loud and bright, and so near.
Looking up, I saw him, and I said, loud, hi Mags! To me, a robin is a greeting from a person that, not so long ago, passed away, and this absolutely made sense, it was exactly fitting my thoughts and comfort.
My voice scared the bird away, so I said, it's okay, Mags, it's me, Hans.. and then, carefully, the robin returned, and sang a song, at a funeral stone, that was aside of the chapel. I asked if I could make a photo, now it was calmed and was sitting there, waiting until I got my camera and made the photo. Then it did fly away.
I was 'wow' ing loud about this, what a wonderful rendezvous that was, and I had tears in my eyes (nooo, NOT the allergy :-) ). I can not describe what I felt, it was like a whitle light, of comfort and warmth. The closure of a beautiful chapture, and the opening of a new way of communication with my friend.
I took a deep sigh, and then a black feather dropped down from the bushes, right in front of me.
Now (I think I wrote it before), feathers are something special as well. It are the communication between me and my mother. At different moments, when I need her support, the feather is coming on my way, no matter where I are. And this time, it was there again, as if she came along at our party of friendship.
It was such an intimate moment that I had, there in the middle of nature. Where human and spirits gathered. Now, a few days (and a few stones) later, I decided to write this down. Maybe none of you can ever understand what I mean. That is fine.
But, maybe, some people do understand. :)
Just needed to share it with you, I love this so much. Life is real!